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Konrad Werner: Bulgarians, Romanians and Bavarians

Konrad wanted to get stoned and go to the movies. But because the CSU are such dicks he had to write this instead.

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Now would be the time, Merkel. This would be the moment. There are municipal elections coming up in March in Bavaria. You can finally call the CSU’s bluff and field CDU candidates in Bavaria. This is your chance to rid yourself of these turbulent priests.

The Christian Social Union, often called the “Bavarian sister party to Merkel’s Christian Democratic Union” by baffled Anglo journalists who can’t understand why they exist, has again presented a policy that isn’t just entirely independent of its supposed sibling, but is obviously just a blindingly obvious attempt to outflank anti-European parties in advance of the local council elections in Bavaria. And once again, a Bavarian party that never stops going on about how much it loves being a Bavarian party and how great Bavaria is (“Bavaria first” a slogan on its website proclaims, or “a strong Bavaria in Berlin”) is allowed to determine the national political debate for a whole bloody week.

This week it banged a worn-out drum, warning that eastern Europeans would take advantage of EU expansion to flood into Germany and start working here and/or claiming Hartz IV. This time it was Romanians and Bulgarians – a couple of years ago it was Poles and Slovakians, in a few years’ time it’ll be Croatians. The CSU’s brand new policy paper was leaked to the press this week, and caused much debate with its not-properly-rhyming slogan “Wer betrügt, der fliegt.” “Anyone who cheats gets kicked out.” In other words, the CSU wants to make sure that any foreigner who falsely claims benefits gets sent home. This IS ALREADY THE LAW. That’s right, the CSU has managed to cause a big fucking media debate by calling for something that ALREADY EXISTS. WHY? Who knows? Why has my spaniel got bollocks? Why am I writing about it? I could be getting stoned and eating weird German Kaktus Eis and watching a 3D movie on IMAX. IMAX!! In 3D!! Imagine. It’s so big and so deep. 

But no, because these fucking regional cunts are so worried about losing votes to the Alternative für Deutschland in March and they just couldn’t think of anything with a lower denominator than a slightly-racist fear mongering slogan about all the Romanians, I now have to sit here and join all the other commentators to point this out:

1) The EU changes that came into effect on January 1 had no bearing on social benefits. These are, and always have been, under the jurisdiction of national governments, not the EU. All that happened is that Romanians and Bulgarians now have the right to look for work here. They are allowed to come here for three months to try and find work. During this time, they have no claim to Hartz IV or any other benefit like children’s allowance. In fact, this immigration expert says Germany’s public finances are likely to make a net profit from all the extra taxes and national insurance contributions they will pay.

2) Most of those expected to come will be qualified enough to find work, which is why Germany’s industry associations are all really excited, because Germany needs more skilled workers.

 3) Anyway, if you’re so worried about mass immigration, why not force companies to pay a living wage and provide good working conditions?

Right. There. Everyone else has said it and I’ve said it too. Can I go to the IMAX now?