Monday, April 7
The strawberry döner: it’s real
There is a recipe for a type of news story that is nearly impossible for the German media to resist. It commands attention, no matter how much one might try to avoid it. These stories are particularly prominent at this time of year—spring and early summer—because they involve a very specific set of ingredients:
One: a local business or regional employer.
Two: seasonal produce.
Three: eating revoltingly.
Mix those together, and you’ve got yourself a story bound to make headlines in Berlin. Accordingly, we now present: the Karl’s Erdbeerhof strawberry döner.
As of April 5, the Brandenburg-based agricultural company Karl’s Erdbeerhof has launched a new concept restaurant in Elstal, near Berlin, offering what they describe as “the savoury spice of a classic döner kebab” combined with “fruity strawberry flavour”. According to their website, it contains “tender chicken, fresh strawberries, crisp salad, and homemade sauce” — perfect, they claim, “for those looking for a fruity change”.
If that already sounds fairly frightening, just wait until you see how it looks: the classic combination of sliced meat and salad is sandwiched between two slices of bread so luridly red that it appears as though you’re eating a kebab wedged between slabs of liver freshly pulled from a corpse.
Anyone curious enough to try this culinary—let’s say—experience will need to head to Karl’s Erlebnis-Dorf, the strawberry-themed amusement park just west of Berlin. There, visitors can also enjoy strawberry-themed rides, a roller coaster, an aquarium, two ice sculpture exhibitions, tractor rides and the world’s largest coffee pot collection.
So, well done, Karl’s. You win this year’s unofficial award for seasonal-produce-based döner marketing gimmick. We look forward to seeing your little strawberry huts around the city in a month or so, and we’ll try to forget that last year taz ran a piece on the poor working conditions of your seasonal labourers, under the memorable headline: “Unbearable Strawberry Nazis.”
