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The problem child’s birthday: July 4 in Berlin

Proud to be an American? Ehh... at least there are burgers, beer and BBQ to look forward to. Here's where homesick Amis can celebrate.

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Maria Runarsdottir

All right, so there’s a Muslim ban and a backwards health care bill and an environmental policy that we’re gonna go ahead and blame last week’s Berlin monsoon on. But in the midst of this dark chapter in American history, these 4th of July events are here to remind Berliners of all the good things the Amis have given us. Ignore whatever Twitter shitstorm is happening at the moment and celebrate the following…

Barbecue. Yeah, the technique of slow-cooking meat over fire was actually brought to America by German (and Czech) immigrants, but did Germans invent barbecue sauce? Or baked beans? Or aprons with boobs on them? You’ll find at least two of those at Mitte’s Bird Express, which will be firing up the smoker for brisket, Buffalo wings and more, served with Brooklyn Brewery beers. Event here.

Really bitter beer. Pilsner is for pussies, brah! Down in Mariendorf, the Arrogant Bastards of Stone Brewing will be tapping some 50 craft brews with names that wouldn’t be out of place on a Gathering of the Juggalos lineup (Monkey Paw, w00tStout, Who You Callin’ Wussie). Plus grilling and free cake.

James Dean. Where would cinema today be without the pouty all-American bad boy of Rebel Without a Cause? Or, as the Germans call it (sigh): …Denn sie wissen nicht, was sie tun. Watch it in English with German subs at Freiluftkino Kreuzberg.

“The Resistance”. As relieved as you might feel to be watching all the madness unfold from the comfort of Europe, part of you wishes you could charge into the fray. Well, in case you haven’t heard, it’s Resistance Summer (don’t worry, we hadn’t heard either): the Democrats’ latest attempt to instil fire in the bellies, or at least on the BBQ grills, of their constituents. In Berlin, this means a Democrats Abroad potluck in Kreuzberg. 

And if all this has you missing America a little too much: an hour or so with the drunken hordes at Belushi’s or Hard Rock Cafe will have you back waving the Schwarz-Rot-Gold in no time.