Let’s face it, heading into the holidays isn’t easy for anyone, but it can be especially tough for queer internationals who face additional risks for feelings of loneliness if they live in Germany with no family to go to over the break. Even if they do have family within reach, there’s no guarantee that this family is accepting of who they are.
On top of this, many of us are still dealing with some pretty devastating events from November: the election of Donald Trump to the US presidency and the announcement that Germany will hold new snap elections of the federal government which could move the country to the right.
Be extra attentive this time of year as people struggle with new impending layers of discrimination as well as familiar sources of pain.
I don’t want to be all doom and gloom with this column, but we do need to be realistic. Queers have a lot to deal with this season, from the private to the political. But just to break it down, we know from a report the German Institute for Economic Research (DIW Berlin) published in 2021 that queer people are three to four times more likely to experience mental health issues such as anxiety and depression, for trans people specifically, it’s even higher.
They report higher levels of loneliness and stress-related physical health issues. According to Mental Health Europe, “about 26% of the LGBTQ+ community will experience depression at some point in their lives, compared to 10% of cis-heterosexual people”.
I don’t need to read statistics to see this. Several friends of mine have already told me they are feeling lonelier than usual at this time of year. Queer loneliness isn’t in any way new, especially in Berlin. Our constant buffet of sexual gratification and unending options of one-off partners often has us neglecting building strong emotional connections with others. No slut-shaming here – I’ve done it, too – but not being aware of it can lead to some negative emotions down the road. And people seem to be feeling extra vulnerable right now.
If you notice your friends are feeling lonely, reach out to them, invite them to your dinners or simply hit up the cinemas or a bar with them. Be extra attentive this time of year as people struggle with new impending layers of discrimination as well as familiar sources of pain. Be extra attentive to yourself, too. The world may be going to shit, but alongside the panoply of decadence Berlin has to offer, it also offers a good number of resources for those struggling with mental health.
You can reach out to Schwulenberatung, which caters to gay men and LGBTQ+ individuals, GLADT e.V. for intersectional support for BIPoC queers, Lesbenberatung for queer women and femme-identifying queers, or TransInterQueer for trans, intersex and queer individuals, to name a few. All these organisations offer support in English, some in additional languages as well. In these darkest of times, both literally and figuratively, let’s try to be each other’s light as often as we can.
